Saying Goodbye

Today is both a happy and a sad day.  Today is the last day that I will be watching Mr. T.I’ve known for a long time that Mr. T’s mama, my good friend Logan, really wanted to stay home with him.  I certainly understand the feeling, having worked full-time (and then some) when Nora was an infant, but I also know what a hard choice it can be to take the leap of faith and quit working — especially in a place like Nantucket with a high cost of living.  But it is possible.  We manage to do it, and a few months ago, Mr. T’s parents decided to do it too.  And so Logan gave her notice, and today is the last day I’ll be babysitting Mr. T.

I am so incredibly happy for Logan.  I remember my first week at home with Nora after quitting my job and how incredibly amazing and joy-filled it was.  For weeks, I would think to myself, how could I possibly have sent her to a babysitter for 8-9 hours every day?  How could I have not been doing this from the moment she was born?  I know Logan is going to get the same sort of amazing fulfillment being home with Tavio that I do being with Nora; I know that Tavio is going to be a happier, healthier kid because of it.  But I can’t help being a little sad too.

In the eleven months that I have watched Tavio, well over 1500 hours, he became a part of our family.  I have watched him turn from a tiny baby to an adorable toddler.  He went from sleeping away his time here, to running back and forth with Nora.  They have become more than friends; he’s like her brother, I know she loves him immensely, and I know that she will really miss him being part of her days. What makes this change especially hard is that not only will I not be watching Mr. T any more, but we also won’t be able to have play dates with him either.  He’s moving off-island and about as far away as one can imagine: to Brazil.

After today, they only have one week left on Nantucket.  I’ve been trying to prepare Nora for this big change.  We are planning to get together a few times next week and to Skype after they have moved, but my heartbreaks knowing that she really isn’t going to understand where her friend went.  I’m getting teary-eyed just thinking about it.  Already, I’m teary-eyed thinking about not getting to snooze with him on my chest anymore or laugh at his silly games of peekaboo behind our curtains.  I’m sad for the loss of his mama, my best island friend, and for silly visions I had of Nora and Mr. T going to prom together (or something).

Logan, Tiago, and Tavio, we wish you well on your exciting new adventure, can’t wait to hear all about it, and to hopefully visit soon…but know you’re leaving a big hole and you will be missed so, so much.